I love the different seasons. I am always in awe of something as simple as the weather changing from the dead heat of summer to the crisp mornings of fall. From what I have heard the winters in the Bakken are rather brutal, and honestly I am not a fan of the weather dipping below 40 degrees ABOVE 0…so cold is cold is cold to me. As much as I look forward to the change in the seasons, there is something about the change that makes me a little uneasy.
I enjoy being in control and knowing what I am going to wear the next day. In the heat of the summer, it’s a no brainer. It’s HOT, so you wear something that will keep you cool. But when the weather starts to change, then you are in this weird spot of: I don’t know what it’s going to be like today, or it might be cold in the morning and then warm by afternoon and so then outfits need to be changed.
And I am not gonna lie this kind of change relates to many areas of my life. I will call them seasons. There are seasons in my life where I know what is going to happen the next day. Like after I give birth, I know that life is going to be chaotic, however my goals for the day are drastically different than they were 6 months prior to giving birth. My goals are simply to enjoy my newborn.
I am in a season of change in my life. I’ve moved to a new location, and I haven’t quite found my little niche of the Bakken yet. I don’t ever know what my days are going to look like, or who I will see, and goodness with the weather taking a cooler turn today; I am not even sure what I will wear.
It’s always during these times of change that I realize what a creature of habit I truly am. I like to think that I am spontaneous, when in actuality I am not. While sometimes I get a wild hair to do something out of the ordinary, most of my days are relatively the same. And what was great about being in a comfortable place was that I had girlfriends that knew and loved me, and that would be my ride home if I ever needed one. (Um…thank you, Kathy!!) Here, I have to start over. I’ve met all kinds of awesome women, but it takes time to develop the kind of relationship that you can call someone at 9pm on a Saturday night and say “hey, I am stuck at the local coffee shoppe, dude, get out of your jammies and come get me!” That could potentially end a friendship if it’s in the new stages of forming.
So I here I am…changing. I am no longer in my comfort zone; I am in God’s adventure. I don’t have people that I can just let it all hang out with yet, and I am certainly still unsure of my surrounding. I know that change brings about amazing things. I know that God never wants me to be in my comfort zone and that His goals for my life are to make my holy (more like Him), not happy (being how I want to be). I know all these things with my head, but I need to learn to believe them with my heart. I need to remember to rest in what is unchanging (Christ), when everything around me is changing.
Goal for the day: Remember that change in me is good! I want to be less like me, and more like Jesus. So bring on the CHANGE!